Thanksgiving 2015: We have a government that operates in slow motion, Thanksgiving is becoming just another day for shoppers to trample over each other, and everything that tastes good is bad for us. It’s an upside-down world, so the holiday is here just in time. I’d like to serve up some gratitude to some of the people, places and things that make me happier than a pardoned turkey.
Thank you to whoever built my 1997 Toyota. It is just now entering its prime.
Thank you Charles Osgood. You lower my blood pressure every Sunday Morning on CBS. You prove the news can be delivered without a bunch of people yelling at each other.
Thank you to the Nigerian prince who says he’s sending me a “large transfer of funds.” When I disappear from public view, you’ll know the check has cleared.
Thank you to everyone who uses headlights when driving in rainy or foggy weather. (The rest of you, I worry about.)
Thank you Chris and Vince, for making life a party whenever we’re together.
Thank you to whoever invented Cap’n Crunch, root beer floats, and chocolate-covered, cream-filled doughnuts. Growing older is hard enough, so we might as well have our comfort food, right?
Thank you to my past and current co-workers who have done so much for me while getting very little in return.
Thank you Andrelton Simmons, for playing shortstop better than anyone else. I’ll miss you at Braves games, but not nearly as much as your pitchers will.
Thank you to the late Mark Garner’s family, for sharing him with us during his bright and shining life. He would have loved the Tennessee Vols this year.
Thank you Dex and Mo at US-101 for our enjoyable phone conversations each day.
Thank you to the stores who donate gift cards when I honor a local hero. You’ve never told me “no.”
Thank you to everyone who visits a nursing home, especially if you don’t have a relative there.
Thank you Jim Powell, radio voice of the Braves. You’re carrying on the great tradition of Ernie, Skip and Pete.
Thank you Coca Cola for those Freestyle vending machines. I still haven’t tried every combination, but I’m working on it.
Thank you police officers. You get some bad press now and then, but I appreciate you putting your lives on the line for me. I owe you all a burger, at least.
Thank you to the Govan family of South Pittsburg, who first put me on the radio all those years ago. You sure started something.
Thank you to my great radio friends, two of which are Tommy Jett and Max O’Brien. Together, I call them “TJ Max.”
Thank you to my amazing sister Elaine, who still pampers me on my birthday. As I’ve often said, being a baby brother is highly recommended.
Thank you to my wonderful wife Cindy who makes my stories so much better by correcting the mistakes, making me seem smarter than I really am.
Thank you Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter, for showing us how to live a meaningful and enjoyable retirement. Your smooch on the Braves “KissCam” was a highlight of the year.
Thank you to the people who brought a skating rink, “Ice On The Landing” to downtown Chattanooga, drawing visitors from everywhere. Thanks also for heeding the advice of those who wished to make it bigger this year. You listened!
Thank you Hixson Transmission, S & S Auto Repair, Firestone Northgate, and Tire World. It’s great having auto mechanics I can trust.
Thank you SEC football players and coaches. You provide the best entertainment on TV, week after week.
Thank you to everyone who still considers spelling to be an important skill.
Thank you Cartersville GA High School football players, for being part of the celebration when Heritage High’s team manager Logan Pickett, an autistic student, scored a touchdown against your team. You won my heart.
That’s my list for 2015. If you’ve read this all the way to the end, you deserve more than my thanks. You deserve a nap. Happy Thanksgiving! (And enjoy the video below: “Uptown Funk” brilliantly edited with scenes from Hollywood’s all-time best dance movies!)