Making Eye Contact with the Class of 2013

 

My friends at Hamilton Heights Christian Academy asked me to speak at their high school graduation program, which is an offer I could not refuse.

You see, I’ve been seeking revenge since my own graduation night.  As any adult can testify, as a high school senior you have only one goal at commencement:  just get out of there with your diploma.

No one, least of all 18-year-olds who have been adhering to dress codes all their lives, wants to hear some guy tell them to change the world.  Heck, they just want to change into their t-shirts and sandals.

But back to my own graduation:  sitting in a hot gym while the principal introduced a local minister, who would share “The Secrets to a Successful Life.”  Okay, I thought, this shouldn’t take long.  It’s 85 degrees in here.  Yes, air conditioning had been invented.  Some people just hadn’t gotten the word.

Here comes Secret # 1: something about getting involved in the community.  He elaborated on that for a while.  Then came # 2:  Do a lot of volunteer work. He started spelling that out too.  Hmmm, it sure sounded a lot like Secret # 1.  Anyway, my attention span kept drifting, and I figured he would stop at 5 secrets.

Nope, about thirty minutes later, he was up to # 6.  So it would be a top-10 list, right? We’re more than halfway home!  Until of course he got to # 11….and beyond.  I think he ended up sometime the next morning with 23 or some odd number.  He had lost me at “hello.”

So I pledged that if I ever spoke to a graduating class, I would keep it short.  I once made the mistake of telling a group of seniors that “I will be speaking to you for the next ten minutes about….”  So I did my little speech, and it seemed really fast to me.  At the end of the program,  a young lady shook my hand, looked at her watch, and said “Ten minutes, thirty seconds,” with a look on her face that said, “I’ll never get those thirty seconds back.”  It reminded me that no one ever left a graduation and said, “That was a nice program, but you know, that speaker just didn’t talk long enough!”  (It also taught me never to promise a certain amount of time.)

Meanwhile when I visited the Hamilton Heights class of 2013, what did I tell them?  Probably very little they didn’t already know.  I couldn’t tell them what kind of job market to expect.  I’ve been in it for decades, and I don’t know what to expect next week.  But I figure that within a few years, many of them will be doing a job that hasn’t been invented yet.  That’s both exciting and a little scary.  Think about these words:  Twitter, Instagram, Pandora, Hulu, Google, iPhone, iPad, SnapChat, Pinterest.  We hadn’t heard those words a few years ago.  Now some people are making big money from them.  What will the new words be by 2018?

I asked for some advice from my own sons, who are recent college graduates.  I said, “Guys,  you’ve been there.  What would you tell them?  They said very simply, “Show up for class, be on time, and get to know your instructors.  Make sure those teachers know your face and your name.”  They said you’d be surprised how many students don’t show up, and unlike high school, there’s no one trying to track them down when they’re late or absent.  But if you show up on time, and you develop a relationship with your instructors, it really pays off at exam time.  They’re more likely to give you some help when you need it.  I guess showing up really is half the battle.

I told the seniors that the high school teachers they have long feared, now have a new role: lifetime friends and mentors.  Recently I saw Ed Carter, my high school American history teacher. He’s still at it, and I always thank him for instilling my love of history, politics, current events and government.  I give him a lot of credit for whatever success I’ve achieved.  He taught me all the presidents too, in order.  I learned them in 8^th grade and still know them today, even the “new” ones.  I can recite them for you on demand, next time you see me.   For a small fee.

I told them that money can indeed come in handy, but it sure doesn’t bring you love or happiness.  Watch the news and you’ll see a lot of angry millionaires, every single day.

I told them how much I admire people who win without bragging about it, and who lose without making excuses.  The way I see it, if you’re good at something, even if you’re the best at it, you will never have to tell anyone.  They will know.

I told them that at least one old saying is true: “If you find a job you love, you’ll never work a day in your life.”  That happened to me.  I am blessed beyond my wildest dreams.

I told them that sleep is underrated.  Get some rest, you won’t miss a thing.

I told them to buckle up, to use their headlights in the rain and fog, and to never text while driving.  I don’t like to say anyone’s name on the news unless it’s for something good.

I told them that even in this age of texting and tweeting, eye contact is still the best way to communicate in matters of love, education and employment.  Set aside a little time every day to put your device down.  Look at people.  Look in their eyes.  Talk to them, listen to them.  At most any college campus, you’ll see students randomly bumping into each other.  Look up every now and then.  You might see something cool.

I told them when their doctor says to wear plenty of sunscreen,  he’s not kidding!  I hope they do a better job of following those instructions than I did.

And I told tell them to try to do something nice for someone every day, without being asked.  That always seems to put the cherry on my hot fudge cake.

That’s it, Class of 2013.  Hopefully when you remember your graduation night a few decades from now, you won’t complain that some TV news guy rambled on all night.  Congratulations!  Now get out there and rock our world.